Sunday, February 27, 2011

A very bad night for us all.

Basically, Payton's cold has taken a turn for the worse. We went from runny noses and frequent coughs to high fevers and no sleeping or eating. I can honestly say that Saturday night was one of the worst nights we've gone through. As a newborn I would sometimes be up until 2 AM walking around and bouncing her trying to get her to sleep but, that has nothing on last night. She slept from 7-10 PM in her swing because that was the only way I could get her to fall asleep. This has never happened since she's been born. She has never been one to sleep in the swing. I happened to take one Nyquil because I too am getting sick. Big Mistake. 10 minutes after I fell asleep Layne woke me up because she had woken up and he couldn't get her back to sleep. I nursed her in hopes of her nursing herself back to sleep, but no, we were up for almost the rest of the night rocking and bouncing, playing and talking, consoling and comforting. Nothing was working. My poor, sweet, precious baby was in pain. With every little cough was a cry for pain. We tried everything known to man to get her to fall asleep to no avail. She finally ended up sleeping from 3-4 AM in her crib, and then 4-5 AM in bed with me and Layne.

We were all sleep deprived and grumpy. I think I got a total of an hours worth of sleep that night. This was especially hard on me because the night before I had basically pulled an all-nighter as well. I knew it was taking a toll on body; I developed a fever and started to feel very faint but I had to keep on going and take care of my very sick baby who needed my constant attention. One of the hardest things I've had to do. I don't know how I could have done it all by myself.

I'm not one to normally whisk off to the E.R. or doctor unless I think something is really wrong. In just 12 hours my daughter took a 180 and lost her appetite, was running a 102.4 fever that morning, and not sleeping at all. She was completely miserable. Unfortunately, she has a respiratory virus that we just have to wait out. We are now resorting to alternating Tylenol and Advil every 3 hours which luckily does help with the fever. I also figured out a new routine and dance of rocking and bouncing for 30 minutes until she is in a deep sleep before I put her in her crib. She just wants to fall asleep in mom's arms...and I don't blame her. I want her to know I will always be there for her, especially when she needs me the most. She is currently going on 2 hours for her 3rd nap today, poor baby!

 We are crossing our fingers for a healthy baby soon! Even through all this she still manages to smile and be as sweet as ever. We love her so much!

Friday, February 25, 2011

Colds, Crawling, and Car Seats!

On Payton's 7 month birthday two days ago, she was off and crawling more like a baby and less like a handicapped frog. I have to admit I find it ridiculously cute to see her being semi-mobile now. She has learned to use her feet instead of knees to crawl on the wood floors because of course they give better traction. She is so determined to get to where she's going; I find it quite amusing and I encourage it. More power to her if she wants to go get the toy herself. Saves me a trip! 

She was also greeted with a very nasty cold that dad passed on to her. There is nothing worse than a sick baby, except a sick baby who can't sleep and therefore a mom who doesn't sleep.

I took her to the doctor's today because it was getting worse and the poor baby is miserable. She weighed the same as she did at her 6 month appt - 15 lbs. 14 oz. and is "perfectly fine". Perfectly fine, to them. They are not the ones who are constantly wiping her nose dry or having to hear her sad cough all through the night. They don't have to see her choking on food or crying constantly because she just wants to be comforted. I am happy that she doesn't have something worse like pneumonia, an ear infection, or dehydration. I just wish there was more we could do for her. I feel helpless. No one likes to be sick. I hate that fact that my little baby has to go through that misery. I would say I wish I could be sick for her, but I know it's inevitable. I'm pretty much doomed in fact. I think I'm going to go down a bottle of Vitamin C now because I feel the sore, scratchy throat coming on. I feel bad for anyone that is going to have to be around me if I get sick because I turn into death.

Her beautiful watery eyes.

Fuzzy kitty feet and tissues to help fight off the cold!
Well I guess for now it's just kisses & cuddles for our little love bug!

Oh and let me mention, we upgraded Payton to a big girl car seat yesterday. We got the Safety 1st Air Protect. I was getting tired of lugging that infant car seat everywhere so now she gets to ride in her fancy pancy new one that we L-O-V-E! She looks like such a big girl in it! We are going to be taking a 9 day trip down to Southern California next month so we definitely wanted a bigger car seat for the long travel.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Love, Adventure, & Snow.

This week has been a mixture of just about everything you can imagine. A week to remember. Moments of what being a family is all about. And also moments of complete and utter craziness.


Layne and I decided we wanted to take a trip up to Lake Tahoe for Valentine's Day just like we did last year. We love the idea of using money that we would've spent on each other to spend on something we can do together instead. But, life happened and plans changed. Instead, Mama Coey came down to babysit Payton after we put her down for the night so we could go out for a nice Valentine's Day dinner at the Elephant Bar. This was the place of our first date down in Palm Springs, and one of the best memories as a couple. It was a gorgeous night on Sunday as we soaked but the warm breeze and sat looking at each other with the same love we've had since day one. We reminisced about every special memory we have had and the many more we can't wait to make. Having the baby has taught us to treasure moments together even more and to appreciate any given chance to have an intelligent adult conversation. Fellow moms know what I mean.

Love to me is seeing how Layne looks at Payton...or the way Payton lays her head across my chest... or the feeling of complete security when we are all together even if it's in utter chaos. To me, Valentine's Day is Love Day. It is about appreciating the love in your life and the love you have for one another.


I use to think of myself as a pretty adventurous person. Since becoming a mom I have suddenly turned into the most overly-cautious person that it still surprises me sometimes. I still have moments of wanting that freedom of spontaneity and lucky for me Payton is a very easy, laidback baby so we can always just pick up and go if we want.

On Valentine's Day last Monday we decided that instead of going to Tahoe, we would just make a short trip up to the snow because the weather was turning bad. We ended up at Donner's Pass 45 minutes north east of us where we picked a random road to drive off of and "experience" all-wheel drive. To say that I was nervous is an understatement, even at 5 mph. I was cringing and being Layne's worst back-seat driver nightmare. Payton was happily cooing away in the back as I was yelling at Layne to "STOP!" or "Turn around, there is too much snow". We are used to hot summers and fairly mild winters (well, compared to up north) so driving on even small patches of snow scares the beejezus out of me. All in all, it ended up to be a fun little adventure. We side parked it on a dead end road and played, or rather awed, at the snow for a couple minutes before Payton had enough. We happily waddled away in our bundle of clothes and a sense of togetherness.

Sometimes I just want to slow time down just so I can savor being in the moment that much longer. Life can be that good sometimes. I want to remember every speck of detail and emotion because I'm afraid in a flash it will be gone and we're 10 years older. Our day ended with a drive back full of talk and laughter as the baby slept. We made a wonderful home-cooked meal consisting of Mongolian Beef with brown rice and Veggie Lo Mein. And settled. It was nice. Just what we needed. 

And that's where our adventure should have ended. But there were other plans.

Thursday our spontaneity kicked in and we went to drive up to Grass Valley to see Layne's mom because it was SNOWING. I thought it might just be trickling snow...but it was dumping. In the 24 years Layne has lived in Northern California he has never actually seen it snow. We had to go.

There is something about the snow that is so magical to me. 

The way it glistens...
The way the snow flakes flutter down in patterns of disarray...
The way it makes me feel like a kid again...
I want Payton to experience the magic that every child should.

But THIS was a winter storm.

And it turned into a wreck....literally.

We were on our way back home when we decided the "scenic" route would be much more suitable to us to experience and enjoy. We soon found the roads were too slippery and unplowed. We turned around and even cautiously making our way through the thick, slushy roads full of ice and snow couldn't stop the car who was about to hit us head on. We swerved and barely missed the car, barely missed the tree right in front of us, and almost flipped. We ended up on a slope with the car at an angle that, with the right leverage, could have still easily flipped or slid down the slope.

The road we ended up sliding off of. 
There are those moments few and far between when life suddenly goes into slow motion. I found myself thinking of a million things in just a few short seconds. I could feel myself brace for impact. I looked at my husband and closed my eyes to just...wait.

We stopped. I breathed.

Layne was still in a panic because he thought if he took his foot off the brake we were going to flip. The guy helped us out as fast as we could climb out. And there we were in the freezing cold with snow dumping on us and my baby not properly dressed for a winter storm. They closed the road down and we waited for Layne's mom to come to the rescue. I feel so lucky that nothing worse happened and that we were close enough to Mama Coey's house to wait out the snow there.

When you are not in immediate danger, the snow can be quite beautiful. Payton thought so too.

We sat by the fire, ate hot soup, and cozied up on the couch until we decided we were actually going to brave it home that night since it cleared.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

When things all come together

Recently I have been in a state of pure love filled bliss. It may be the gorgeous California weather, the upcoming trips we are getting to take, or the oxytocin hormone that is released every time I see my husband and daughter. Once I wake up out of my coma state of sleepiness I get to look forward to this...

Need I say more?

 Well if that's not enough...
Layne feels the need to excel his duties of awesome husbandness even more by CLEANING yesterday. I mean full out sorting laundry, sweeping, putting dishes away, picking up cleaning. Happy early Valentine's Day to me! He also let me continue sleeping that night because he knew how I exhausted I was and stayed up with Payton for over an HOUR until 3 AM. 

Oh the things that steal my heart now..

Sending the feely goodness of love your way! 

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Sleep? What's that?

I knew once I had my baby that sleep would be a thing in the past. Boy was I right! Not only is it a thing in the past, it is nearly almost non-existent...well, it feels that way anyways.

Payton's sleep habits have been changing constantly since the day she was born. I will not advocate one sleep method over another because every baby is different and everyone has their own parenting styles. I have tried every NON Cry-it-Out method and letting her cry for 3-5 minutes at a time and then going in to soothe her/pick her up/put paci in in between the intervals of crying. This worked best for us, sort of a modified Ferber method at almost 5 months.

...And I am proud to say I am STILL a zombie mommy. Sleeping through the night for me is getting 4-5 straight hours of sleep. Aren't you jealous? This is a treat compared to when she was waking every 45 minutes at 4 and 1/2 months old because she needed me to put her back to sleep every time. Right now we are going through a rough patch of extreme overtiredness, teething, and always wanting mommy so, in other words, we are back to waking every few hours and then wanting to party at 3 a.m. She thinks it is both fun and funny to keep us up with her and see us dragging our lifeless bodies around for 2 straight hours in the middle of the night. Not as much to my amusement! I can't help but laugh sometimes though. You have to find the humor in parenting or you won't come out alive.

Oh the joys of motherhood! There is always the ying to the yang, the good with the bad. As soon as I snuggle her and see that sweet little face, all my tired crankiness goes away and I can't help but smile. I would do anything for this little girl...including getting up all hours of the night to make her happy. It's a good thing she is so darn cute and we love her so much.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Ramblings of a SAHM

 I thought my life of mommyhood would bring tales of good humor, gross things, and heartwarming stories that I could share and blog about. Don't get me wrong, it is filled with these treasures, but life this week has been pretty mundane I guess you could say. It's been hard for me to get out of the daily routines and schedule winter had me on. The southern girl in me wants nothing to do with the outside world when it is even the slightest bit nippy outside. I am so happy the weather here has been gorgeous the last couple of days though. Now I have to re-figure out my days because I've been in such a slump. I have been overcome with fatigue and finding it hard to muster up enough energy or motivation to do anything I want to do or get done. And let me tell you, I have a whole wish list of things. Taking care of a baby 24/7 does not make it easy either. Little missy girl is my #1 priority though so I devote all hours of the day to her. When I finally get a moment to breathe and relax, that's exactly what I want to do. It's exhausting but completely worth it!

Today was one of those days. The most exciting part of the day was going shopping for baby food. Exciting, I know. We got a bundle of about 35 jars of baby food. At least we know someone won't be starving. Which by the way, we are almost back in full swing to nursing full-time again! A big hooray for that!

I do of course enjoy my days of fun and entertainment with my sweet P. Everyday holds something new and a new memory to cherish. Today she tried to get up on her knees and move forward which resulted in her "hopping" like a frog in one place. I seriously need a video of this. Something else she does is if you give her toys while she is in her highchair she will throw them on the ground, on purpose. Every. single. toy. I probably shouldn't find this amusing or funny, but it is. I'm okay with it because she gives me the cutest little smirk right afterwards. Little stinker!

And yesterday Layne was sick all day. It had been awhile, but boy did it sure make up for it. I remember when he was getting sick like that every week. It's hard to see him throwing up constantly, weak, cold sweats, unable to do anything. We figure certain things trigger a flare up (He has a very severe case of irritable bowel disease, among other things). It is getting easier to deal with now that we know what it is and how to try and treat the symptoms. He has lost around 40 lbs. in a matter of months. Some people would probably hate him for that. But that is just not healthy. I am with him "for better or for worse, and in sickness and in health." We prefer the 'for better' and 'in health' part though.

I think that's it for my late night ramblings. Now back to my daughter who won't sleep...I think I have my next blog topic in mind.